Unless you’re June Cleaver, you’ve experienced a few hard knocks along the way before arriving at midlife. Here’s a spin off of the 12-step program to read and repeat as often as necessary when you’re experience midlife turbulence.
Admit you are powerless over aging and focus on living full-out (not on autopilot, not half alive, not shackled to your past). Take an honest look at your life – are you fueling greatness or gloom? Eat better, move, laugh often and dance more. Midlife is only unmanageable if you choose to stay stuck. Break free and step into the live you were born to live.
Believe in a power greater than yourself. Find a spiritual home. Be grateful
Let go and let God. Surrender your life to a higher power. As much as you’d like to believe it, you are not in charge and never were. Your life is unfolding as planned. Be open to that. People come and go from our life for a reason. Children grow up and leave the nest. Regroup, re-nest, rejoice.
Do some soul searching and take inventory of your life. The past is the past. Determine what’s working and what’s not and sift down to the good stuff. Forgive those who have hurt you and make amends with those you’ve hurt. Life is simple. We complicate it. KISS (keep it simple sweetheart).
Take accountability for your mistakes, weaknesses, tendencies, shortcomings, crutches, addictions, and share it all with another person you trust who will listen and hug you. Have integrity by getting completely naked during with them emotionally and hold nothing back. This is this biggest housekeeping chore you’ll ever do. Spill it all and sweep it away for good. Your life will shine from this soul cleaning.
Put on your big girl pants and accept where you’re at. The great news is you are allowed to start over. You deserve to make minor adjustments, have a meltdown, a midlife crisis, or a fresh start. Remember, no finger-pointing. Everything that’s happened in your life was an account of choices you made.
Have some of your decisions or actions caused rifts, carnage, divorce, depression, sorrow or holes?
Sweep away the debris and tattered layers you have caused during previous relationships and past lives by making a list of those you have hurt, snubbed, gossiped against, short-changed, or shut out of your life. In full humility let it go and start anew.
Put on your big girl pants and show your willingness to make amends and start anew. This next chapter is going to be amazing.
Apologize, fess up, pay back. Say you’re sorry. Mean it, forgive fully then move on. Make direct amends to you exes, disgruntle relatives, children, co-workers, neighbors. Try not to speak poorly of anyone. Speak with love and remember the good. It attracts more love and goodness into your life.
Love your life. Live with your eyes wide open in your midlife. Admit your mistakes and embrace that life gives you another chance. Always. You are wiser, kinder, softer and more in tune than ever before. To maintain your midlife momentum, share your wisdom with other women. Be soft and bold not bitter and brittle. Be the person that would make you proud if you could visit your own funeral or hear your eulogy 20-40 years from now.
Be open and connected to your higher power. Nurture and grow your consciousness through prayer, yoga, and meditation and ask only for God’s will for you today and in the future. There is more than enough. You lack nothing now and nothing has been taken away from you. Midlife is rich, abundant and filled with all you need to be a happy, fulfilled and a vibrant woman. Drink it up and savor it every day.
You are awake, alive, and blessed. Be there for other women going through midlife challenges and share your knowledge and how you’ve preserved. Give back and be of service.
At midlife you’ve arrived at a great point of perspective that can bring peace and contentment. There truly is splendor in midlife. It won’t fall from the sky. You have to seek it. Then savor it. Then share it.
Please share this 12 step to midlife program with any woman you know needing a lift. Also share with me in giving a huge thank you to the fabulous artist who helped with this post, Deb Eiseman. I’ll be writing about Deb’s story going from Pain to Paint in my Starting Over section later this month.
Deb had to quit her television job after being in a car accident and experiencing chronic pain. Thanks to painting she has reclaimed her life and a fruitful living.
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Category: Health & Happiness