The Case of the Missing Nipple Cover

At precisely 2200, I returned home from the FINCA fundraiser on 03 OCT 12. I immediately retired to my bedroom to change out of my little black dress into warm nightwear as the temperature had fallen 20 degrees.

At approximately 0200, I awoke with need to use the latrine. While releasing significant amounts of sparkling white wine, I noticed I had neglected to remove my self-adhesive nipple covers that cammo’d my areolae that evening.

Against standard operating procedure, I removed the nipple covers, laid them on the latrine counter, failing to return them to the assigned locker.

Upon rising at 0700, I showered, did not shave, and prepared to depart for duty. However, I was detained when I noticed only one nipple cover remaining on the counter.

Perplexed I surveyed the floor, hallway, laundry basket, and trashcan. I saw no sign of the target. It was MIA.

Not to be deterred I conducted a systematic reconnaissance of an outer latrine area, until all parts of the home had passed visibility. Finally I circled back and found the missing nipple cover floating in the cat bowl of the suspect named Popcorn.

The nipple camouflage device was intact, minus one chunk showing the silicone piece had been subject to a feline pre-emptive strike. Rather than detaining the subject, Popcorn, or setting a future “booby trap,” I placed the areola covers in their armored cases and secured them in lockdown.

Mission accomplished. Case solved.

 

 

 

Tags: Humor

Category: Fashion & Beauty